Well, I promised you an update, but don’t come crying to me if it bores you.
I have this dress. It’s adorable. I love it to pieces, not least because it has huge pockets and cost 8 pounds (Primark). But there’s a problem with the dress. Well, not with the dress; it’s with me. This dress, like so many of my favorite/hated dresses, is strapless.
Now, putting aside for the moment the difficulty of finding a good, comfortable strapless bra, the issue is this: I have wings. Not just wings, but striped wings.
Did anybody watch The Real World, Hollywood? If so, did you notice Joey’s fatty stretch marks? That’s what happens when you work out too much or you allow a tiny parasite to invade your uterus: you get silvery lines of ‘oh god WHY’ messages from your skin. Incidentally, it’s also what happens when you gain a ton of weight. And when you lose it, you keep the lines, as a sort of ‘fuck you’ lack of forgiveness from the body’s largest organ.
Me, I have these things all over. Actually, they’re not bad on my stomach or hips, but for some reason they’re pretty bad on my chest/boob-sides (and the absolute WORST are the ones that show up, thankfully only in certain light, on the rounds of my shoulders). I know. Sexy. Anyway, most girls have them on their boobs, because they usually sprout pretty fast and take the skin by surprise. But mine are nearer to my armpits, I guess. Basically they’re RIGHT where strapless dresses like to sit. So not only do I get these little soft wing-y bits (which I try to resist poking), but they have stretch marks on them. I’m too young to have obvious stretch marks!
The really painful part is this: strapless dresses should look great on me. I have the perfect figure for them, and I have a lovely collarbone and pretty nice shoulders (in most light). The part of me from the boobs up is really what I like to highlight. But the striped wings ruin all that! It’s too, too depressing.
I’m wearing the dress anyway, partly because I love it and it’s super comfy, but mostly because my boyfriend and my best friend and anyone else I ask (including my harsh, honest mother) says the wings aren’t noticeable to anyone but me, but the experience is much dampened by my self-consciousness. I think I might start using cocoa butter or something; isn’t that supposed to work on stretch marks? Any advice??
It’s sad when a 23-year-old is cruising pregnancy websites for ideas about how to deal with her body issues. But then again, what the hell would I write about if I liked the way I look?
I have this dress. It’s adorable. I love it to pieces, not least because it has huge pockets and cost 8 pounds (Primark). But there’s a problem with the dress. Well, not with the dress; it’s with me. This dress, like so many of my favorite/hated dresses, is strapless.
Now, putting aside for the moment the difficulty of finding a good, comfortable strapless bra, the issue is this: I have wings. Not just wings, but striped wings.
Did anybody watch The Real World, Hollywood? If so, did you notice Joey’s fatty stretch marks? That’s what happens when you work out too much or you allow a tiny parasite to invade your uterus: you get silvery lines of ‘oh god WHY’ messages from your skin. Incidentally, it’s also what happens when you gain a ton of weight. And when you lose it, you keep the lines, as a sort of ‘fuck you’ lack of forgiveness from the body’s largest organ.
Me, I have these things all over. Actually, they’re not bad on my stomach or hips, but for some reason they’re pretty bad on my chest/boob-sides (and the absolute WORST are the ones that show up, thankfully only in certain light, on the rounds of my shoulders). I know. Sexy. Anyway, most girls have them on their boobs, because they usually sprout pretty fast and take the skin by surprise. But mine are nearer to my armpits, I guess. Basically they’re RIGHT where strapless dresses like to sit. So not only do I get these little soft wing-y bits (which I try to resist poking), but they have stretch marks on them. I’m too young to have obvious stretch marks!
The really painful part is this: strapless dresses should look great on me. I have the perfect figure for them, and I have a lovely collarbone and pretty nice shoulders (in most light). The part of me from the boobs up is really what I like to highlight. But the striped wings ruin all that! It’s too, too depressing.
I’m wearing the dress anyway, partly because I love it and it’s super comfy, but mostly because my boyfriend and my best friend and anyone else I ask (including my harsh, honest mother) says the wings aren’t noticeable to anyone but me, but the experience is much dampened by my self-consciousness. I think I might start using cocoa butter or something; isn’t that supposed to work on stretch marks? Any advice??
It’s sad when a 23-year-old is cruising pregnancy websites for ideas about how to deal with her body issues. But then again, what the hell would I write about if I liked the way I look?
Comments
Unfortunately, this is not my area of expertise (which is probably a nice way of putting it). But maybe you could learn more about the nature of stretch marks? I mean, I know they won't go away completely, but maybe there are some daily routines you can do, like eating foods that help your skin, that can help your skin in the long run, thereby helping you in your quest to conceal them.
Either way, remember, you are beautiful because you are you! (I had to stay consistent, no?)
~A