Happy July everybody!
I can’t believe the time has gone by so fast. I feel like I just got back from London, when in reality we’re coming up on a year since I left. Yeesh. And if all goes well I should be heading back that way in just under three weeks; fingers crossed that the British government gives me a visa…
But you don’t read this blog to learn about my personal and locational life! That’s what this blog is for. This blog is for all my many ugly and my few pleasant thoughts about my body, so here goes.
As you may know, July 1st marks the 12th week of my ‘new’ calorie-counting, gym-going regimen. As you also may know, this regimen, although it follows all logical and mathematical guidelines (I have a resting metabolic rate of around 2700 calories a day, so I eat about 1700 calories a day and work out at least 3 times a week), did me no good at first. In fact, I gained three pounds the first week and spent the next 6 trying desperately to get back to breaking even. And now, you ask? How’s the routine working for you after 3 months of hard work, Anne?
Well, dear readers, there’s good news and bad news. Since, despite my writing style, this is not actually a conversation (yet. Comments are welcome!), I’ll choose for you: bad news first, so we can try to end on a high note for once.
The bad news is I’m still too big for my jeans. After 3 months of regimented eating and exercise, some of my jeans won’t even pull up. I finally caved and ordered a size up, which means I have a great pair of nicely fitting jeans (the good news) but I’m on my way back up to a size 26 (the bad news). Or at least that’s how I see it. I’ve convinced myself that if I’m working this hard and only going higher, it’s only a matter of time before I’m on 1200 calories a day and I’m shopping at Lane Bryant again (not that I’m hating on Lane Bryant; they got me through high school with a lot of surprisingly fashionable choices). I also still hate my lower body excess. All this working out is making my butt all round and high, but I can’t see it through the excess. Ugh. It’s bad when you look in the mirror and the image haunts your dreams.
But I promised you the good news, and there is some. First, the calorie counting has gotten easier. Yes, I still have days (especially during certain times of the month) when I want to eat the world and the whole day is a struggle with myself not to scarf every piece of chocolate I can find. But overall I’m finding it a lot easier to stick to (and even come in under) my limit. I’m also controlling my intake of sodium better and trying to up my fiber levels, and I feel less bloated (although that may also be the exercise). Oh, and I have gone down to about 2.5-3 pounds below my starting weight. Not a huge success, but something is better than nothing (or a gain!).
The other good thing is the exercise. I’m probably in the best shape I’ve been in since senior year of college, when I used to go to the gym 4-5 times a week; I’m heavier than I was then and my ass is bigger, but it still feels good to be strong. Not only am I strong, but besides the ass thing I can really see my body changing. My stomach is a lot flatter and stronger, and jiggles less, and my hips have smoothed out a little, and even with the excess on my butt and legs I do think the overall shape I cut in the clothing I do fit in is more contoured. I’m also finally starting to get a little definition in my arms and shoulders and back again.
So there is good news, and maybe it even outweighs the bad news. It’s so much easier for me to focus on the bad, but I feel like you guys deserve to know the good too (after all, this blog is supposed to be all about frankness and openness).
My boyfriend is convinced that the excess weight and sizing issues will disappear the moment I get back to London, and there’s a part of me that believes him. I walk everywhere in London, and my life is significantly less stressful on a day-to-day basis, if only because the bf is there to coddle me when I need it. So a part of me is thinking “just hold out three more weeks, then you’ll be back in the UK and you can eat nothing but Cadbury and pasta and you’ll still slim down in no time!” But at the same time I don’t want to assume anything, and I also don’t want to lose the muscles I’ve worked so hard to develop.
With that in mind, the plan is to bring my Tae Bo DVD’s (seriously, I love how hard that man kicks my ass) and try to find a gym to join as soon as we have a flat. And who knows, maybe I’ll keep the muscle and lose the fat? But I still think the most important thing to try to lose is the attitude, because given how much I fluctuate I know I’ll be back at this weight sometime in the future. I can only hope it’ll be temporary, and that it won’t stress me out so much.
I can’t believe the time has gone by so fast. I feel like I just got back from London, when in reality we’re coming up on a year since I left. Yeesh. And if all goes well I should be heading back that way in just under three weeks; fingers crossed that the British government gives me a visa…
But you don’t read this blog to learn about my personal and locational life! That’s what this blog is for. This blog is for all my many ugly and my few pleasant thoughts about my body, so here goes.
As you may know, July 1st marks the 12th week of my ‘new’ calorie-counting, gym-going regimen. As you also may know, this regimen, although it follows all logical and mathematical guidelines (I have a resting metabolic rate of around 2700 calories a day, so I eat about 1700 calories a day and work out at least 3 times a week), did me no good at first. In fact, I gained three pounds the first week and spent the next 6 trying desperately to get back to breaking even. And now, you ask? How’s the routine working for you after 3 months of hard work, Anne?
Well, dear readers, there’s good news and bad news. Since, despite my writing style, this is not actually a conversation (yet. Comments are welcome!), I’ll choose for you: bad news first, so we can try to end on a high note for once.
The bad news is I’m still too big for my jeans. After 3 months of regimented eating and exercise, some of my jeans won’t even pull up. I finally caved and ordered a size up, which means I have a great pair of nicely fitting jeans (the good news) but I’m on my way back up to a size 26 (the bad news). Or at least that’s how I see it. I’ve convinced myself that if I’m working this hard and only going higher, it’s only a matter of time before I’m on 1200 calories a day and I’m shopping at Lane Bryant again (not that I’m hating on Lane Bryant; they got me through high school with a lot of surprisingly fashionable choices). I also still hate my lower body excess. All this working out is making my butt all round and high, but I can’t see it through the excess. Ugh. It’s bad when you look in the mirror and the image haunts your dreams.
But I promised you the good news, and there is some. First, the calorie counting has gotten easier. Yes, I still have days (especially during certain times of the month) when I want to eat the world and the whole day is a struggle with myself not to scarf every piece of chocolate I can find. But overall I’m finding it a lot easier to stick to (and even come in under) my limit. I’m also controlling my intake of sodium better and trying to up my fiber levels, and I feel less bloated (although that may also be the exercise). Oh, and I have gone down to about 2.5-3 pounds below my starting weight. Not a huge success, but something is better than nothing (or a gain!).
The other good thing is the exercise. I’m probably in the best shape I’ve been in since senior year of college, when I used to go to the gym 4-5 times a week; I’m heavier than I was then and my ass is bigger, but it still feels good to be strong. Not only am I strong, but besides the ass thing I can really see my body changing. My stomach is a lot flatter and stronger, and jiggles less, and my hips have smoothed out a little, and even with the excess on my butt and legs I do think the overall shape I cut in the clothing I do fit in is more contoured. I’m also finally starting to get a little definition in my arms and shoulders and back again.
So there is good news, and maybe it even outweighs the bad news. It’s so much easier for me to focus on the bad, but I feel like you guys deserve to know the good too (after all, this blog is supposed to be all about frankness and openness).
My boyfriend is convinced that the excess weight and sizing issues will disappear the moment I get back to London, and there’s a part of me that believes him. I walk everywhere in London, and my life is significantly less stressful on a day-to-day basis, if only because the bf is there to coddle me when I need it. So a part of me is thinking “just hold out three more weeks, then you’ll be back in the UK and you can eat nothing but Cadbury and pasta and you’ll still slim down in no time!” But at the same time I don’t want to assume anything, and I also don’t want to lose the muscles I’ve worked so hard to develop.
With that in mind, the plan is to bring my Tae Bo DVD’s (seriously, I love how hard that man kicks my ass) and try to find a gym to join as soon as we have a flat. And who knows, maybe I’ll keep the muscle and lose the fat? But I still think the most important thing to try to lose is the attitude, because given how much I fluctuate I know I’ll be back at this weight sometime in the future. I can only hope it’ll be temporary, and that it won’t stress me out so much.
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